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Growing Gratitude for a New Chance at Life |
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My name is Rie Sumada. I am a member of the Kona Branch. I was born and raised in Japan and in 1982, I married a third-generation Japanese-American from Hawaii and moved here. I have lived since then in the town of Hilo on the “Big Island” of Hawaii. We were blessed with two children and I have followed a busy schedule every day. In the fall of 2007, my husband said that he had something to tell me. Little did I know that what he would reveal next would change my life and that of my children forever. My husband said that for the previous ten years, he had been repeatedly unfaithful to me. He said that he did it because of his desire to find love with others and that he was no longer in love with me. He then asked me for a divorce in order to be with his current girlfriend, who was also seeking a divorce from her husband. I was completely shocked. The notion that the man whom I trusted and respected for as long as 27 years had been unfaithful to me for such a long time was simply devastating. In a panic, I begged him to give our marriage another chance, if only for the sake of our children, but he coldly insisted that his happiness was more important than anything else. With those words, the life I had known and worked so hard for crumbled completely underneath my feet. My husband’s betrayal hit me so hard that it affected the deep feeling of “Who am I?” and “What is the purpose of my life?” I was also afraid that I would lose everything in my life. In desperation, I called Rev. Hiroyasu Hosoyama, the minister of Rissho Kosei-kai of Hawaii, for guidance. I hoped that he would give me practical help to resolve my problem, but instead Rev. Hosoyama spoke of something that would result in changing how I viewed the world. He said that all the phenomena in this world, including our hardships, were manifestations of the Buddha’s compassion. “Yes,” I replied. I had heard that statement many times before, but it didn’t make me feel any better. He then asked me if I truly believed in what he had said. He next asked, “Do you decide yourself that something is good or bad in what the Buddha has arranged for you?” Obviously, I was not at ease with what was happening to me, nor could I accept it as a blessing. Rather, I looked at the situation as something of a catastrophe and wanted it to be fixed. Then Rev. Hosoyama used a metaphor to explain things further. He said, “A wide gulch lies just in front of the world of faith. That gulch looks narrow enough to cross, but for many of us it is very, very difficult to actually take a leap and jump over it. As long as we are on this side of the gulch, the pain of suffering continues. Rie-san, it is time for you to have that unconditional faith in the Buddha. You must believe and accept gratefully that what is happening is his best possible arrangement for you. You should rely wholeheartedly on the Buddha. Until now you have not had solid faith, but he is kindly leading you there. You are at the edge of the gulch—why not take a leap? When you are in the land of faith, everything will be all right.” At last I was able to visualize my situation as if I was looking at a painting of something similar. What Rev. Hosoyama had said was true. I didn’t have unconditional faith in the Buddha. As a daughter of a longtime devoted member of Rissho Kosei-kai, I covered myself with a superficial faith. I had a lonely childhood as a second-generation believer from the time I was four years old since my mother was always away from home, helping fellow members. After I became a parent myself, I didn’t want my children to have the same experience, so I was always reluctant to commit myself fully to the religious responsibilities of the church. Rev. Hosoyama’s guidance helped me to see that my practice was superficial. “What have I been doing all these years?” I asked myself. I suddenly realized how far I had drifted away from the true path. I was so ashamed. As I atoned by chanting the Lotus Sutra before my home altar, I also realized that because of my mother, I could meet the Dharma, which “is rarely met in myriads of kalpas” as described in our Kyoten: Sutra Readings. Because of my mother, I could encounter Founder Niwano’s teachings. Right away, I telephoned my mother in Japan and thanked her, for the first time, for her selfless practice and for passing the Dharma light to me. I vowed to her that I would carry on that inheritance and walk the bodhisattva way for the rest of my life. She was very pleased. |
Congratulations on the fiftieth anniversary of Rissho Kosei-kai of Hawaii. On this day of celebration, I am honored to have been given the opportunity to share my experience with fellow sangha members and distinguished guests of honor.